Monday, August 29, 2011

Fearfully and wonderfully made...

The house is so quiet...just a couple of sounds in the background...Izzy's mechanical swing, the sound of him sighing/breathing, the squeaky recliner and the sound of me typing. It is still hard to believe that I am a mother. A mother...such a lofty, high calling role...that I do not feel worthy of at all. I keep sensing the word "grace" when I think about how unqualified I am to be a mom. I pray every day that I'll be the kind of wife to Thom and mother to Isaac that they deserve. I know I cannot do this on my own and each day I learn. I look over to Isaac "Izzy" swinging and he makes these adorable squeaks and moans as he sleeps soundly. Occasionally he will smile and start only 2 weeks old...I wonder what he is dreaming about. I don't like when he gets this frown on his little face and looks worried-even afraid for a second. How complex and intricate we are as human beings--even as newborns.

One of the most comforting verses I read during my pregnancy was Psalm 139..."For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made....Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them." We had a "sneak peak" look inside the womb...through the 2D and 3D ultrasounds...but to think that all along the Lord could see Isaac being formed and not only that--He was forming him! Next to Psalm 139 in my Bible I have written in the margin "01/05/2011...Little life inside me, the size of a lentil bean-grow, honey, grow. Can't wait to kiss your sweet face and hold you close." Wow. I am so thankful for you Isaac and thankful to the Lord for protecting this life and carrying him to completion.

me and my baby...i love his dinosaur pj's! <3 

just chillin'

baby foot! 

he loves his daddy! 

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